Monday, April 28, 2008

How do I keep child support a secret from wife


How do I keep child support a secret from wife?
I had a affair behind my wife's back. My ex-mistress has filed for child support and medical support (1 year old son will be on my health insurance). Paternity test came back positive. Is there any way to keep the child support and medical support a secret from my wife? I'm not ready to tell her yet!
Marriage & Divorce - 10 Answers
 

 
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
I'd be more concerned about the settlement from your impending divorce.
2 :
keeping it a secret will just delay an ugly scene and make it even uglier when she does find out. time to face the music. man up and tell her.
3 :
You have to man up and tell your wife.
4 :
Unless she sees your check stubs, there's no way she would know you were paying support. You may have to explain a sudden decrease in your take-home pay, however. And the medical insurance probably won't be an issue, either. It isn't like they will call her up and tell her about it. Obviously you should be honest with your wife, blah blah blah, you know that. But in answer to your question, it isn't easy but it is possible.
5 :
The child's name will be on your insurance card and online when you pull up insurance info. Plus, the CS people will mail many things to your home. You really need to tell.
6 :
i do not think keeping this a secret is a good thing for you or anyone. just give her medical insurance card no big deal there and see if you can both settle this as adults go to the child support web site to see what you will have to pay and give it to her on your own nothing good ever comes from the court they dont care about you or her just moving a case
7 :
You may not be ready to tell your wife but you have no other choice but tell her now. It's going to be worst for you if you keep this from her because eventually she will find out. You lied to your wife when you cheated behind her back. You didn't tell her the truth about your son. And now you want to keep the child support a secret. How long do you plan to go behind your wife’s back and pretend that everything is okay? How long do you plan to keep all those secrets from her? Your wife has a right to know everything. She is probably thinking that you have a great marriage but behind her back you cheated on her and had a child with another woman. I'm sorry but I cannot help you with this because I honestly believe that keeping this from your wife is wrong. You need to tell your wife the truth. You may not be ready yet to tell her but she will never be ready to accept what you did behind her back. She may have forgiven you for cheating but to have a baby with another woman is going to destroy her world. But I imagine you weren’t thinking about your wife when you were having an affair behind her back.
8 :
you might be keeping a divorce secret later. be honest!
9 :
Wives are not stupid. She already knows you had an affair, and when she notices the money not coming in like it used to, she's going to add one plus one. A better question would be "how do I tell my wife I fathered a child outside of marriage?" The sooner you do it, the easier it will be. Not that it will be easy, but hey - you should have thought of that sooner, pig.
10 :
its not going to work. they send you monthly statements. its going to be on your health insurance. you might have to go to court. Fess up and maybe somehow your marriage can be saved. I'm just afraid by you trying to hide it - you might end up paying more child support and for longer(through college) because you don't want to deal with it. you might need a lawyer to make sure you are paying the right amount. time to fess up what you did....




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Posted by Child Health at 2:47 PM